White lies and other colors

Around 1982 I take my dad’s grey sweatshirt from his dresser and dye it purple.  I loved purple. Good thing my dad is forgiving ’cause my hands are stained and there was no hiding from that one.

Around 1997 I tell myself that one little white lie won’t hurt.  People can change, things will get better.

Around 1999 I pull on the white dress my mother has made me and wait as she attaches the train.  Sweat runs between my breasts as I walk down the aisle.

Around 1991 After developing and processing film all day, I get curious and look at the photos before I put them in the envelope.  The manager sees me as my face flushes. I look for a new job the next day.

Around 2007 I have a party and after everyone leaves you kiss me and rest your olive-skinned check against mine “we’re just friends, right?” I nodded.  I wish I had said no.

Around 2001 I meet Tony.  He makes me laugh; I cut his black hair on my back porch and watch as the birds carry the ebony fluff to their nests. He is 12 years my junior we are inseparable.

Around 1980 My sister and I sing “The Piña Cola da Song” at the top of our lungs while my mom shops for groceries. That song always reminds me of Christmas in Hawaii.

Around 1981 Linnea and I sneak into Raiders of The Lost Ark. During the movie the film burned up right as the faces were melting off.  We think we are so cool, until our mom’s find out.  Just like mine predicted, I need a nightlight so I can fall asleep.

Around 2009 I pick my friend up at the airport and ask her how long since I’ve seen her.  She says it was ten years ago, on your wedding day.


The Sheets on the Bed Were Starwars

At first it is just a little poke; a nudge rather
tender and moist
this lasts for a few minutes as the two test each other out
Pushing to see how far the other is willing to go
lips on lips and tongues rolling in gentle synchronicity
soft kisses, mouths and tongues in exploration.


Two bodies melt together in this new-found comfort
lying on the bed in the bedroom in a parent’s house
as they familiarize themselves with the other
The thought of being caught adds to the thrill
the anticipation grows
with each press, each kiss, each caress


Bodies in perfect rhythm having finally found the groove
pressed hard against each other,
yet still holding back just that small piece of themselves
Breathing becomes rapid and temperatures begin to rise
tongues and lips continue their discovery
grazing necks, ears, breasts, wrists


Bodies like unexplored lands
eyes and hands search for recognition
clothing heaped like hills and valleys on the floor
Once a place of childhood innocence
long forgotten action figures line the shelves
now the location of a late night rendezvous


Sweaty bodies entangled
finally letting go the pieces they both held back
then…sweet release they knew would come

Hair (and what clothing remains) disheveled
Panting,  boy and girl fall on the bed
Again, and again, and again, and again